There's only one piece of tag art, or in this case painted graffiti, in Port Hope. I know, I've been riding all over on my bicycle looking for spray paint artwork. This sole sample of grafitti, "We are all victims of the system" is behind the drugstore in this town's only strip mall. It's right next to the railway tracks, with a two meter wooden fence blocking the view to the rail line. A safe place to paint without getting caught.
It's not my tag. No, honest, really, it isn't.
My bullshit detector went off right away. It gave me a heading to the closest hardware store - a Home Hardware that is run by Mormons. Rock icon and pedophile Michael Jackson is Mormon. Just so you know.
So I go to the Home Hardware and start snooping in the paint department. Plenty of spray cans on display. One of the young Mormons (it's a family run business, all the employees are related) hovering near by asks if she can help me. Nice, pure blonde teenage Mormon girl, granddaughter of the owner.
"Yes," I say, "is there any age limit on buying spray paint?"
She clues in right away, eyeing me suspiciously. My reputation as a bullshit detective is preceeding me. Maybe it's my trenchcoat, deer stalker hat and pipe.
"Oh yes, you have to be eighteen or over to buy spray paint.", she says.
"Why is that?", I say, eyes narrowing.
"It's because of the fumes.", she says.
"The fumes?", I ask.
"Yes - the kids are sniffing the paint fumes, and dying."
I feel like asking how many bodies have been found to date, but let it slide. 'Cause it's bullshit.
