Raelians Have the Best Costumes

Well, my cult-to-join search in over. The Raelians have the best Web site design and they are conveniently located near Granby, Quebec, just a short seven hour drive away.

The Mennonties are drab dressers who feature no zippers (the devil's mechanical device, I'm sure you'll agree if you have ever been frozen out of you jacket on a ski hill by a snowy zipper) but merely buttons.

Mennonites have only two suits of clothes, one for work the other for worship, and closets are prohibited in the home because supposedly they're a sign of vanity, but actually it's so the fornicators screwing your wife while you are out farming beets has nowhere to hide when you come home early with a headache.

The Mormons are too organized, the Scientologists have Tommy Cruise and the Krishnas have ay too much patchouli oil.

Some of you have wondered why I was interested in the religious sects, but you have to realize that even religious girls get horny.

Don't Leave Home Without Them

I have enjoyed a couple of days off Blogging, but it was getting to me. I have so many ideas during the course of a day, and it's fun deciding (or not) which pearls of wisdom to publish.

Today's bit is about underwear. For common folk like we, all we have to be concerned about is getting hit by a bus, only to find out much later that the clinical staff and paramedics got a big charge out of how our guts have exploded into our already dirty underwear.

Of course a minority of others, the so-called rich and famous, have other concerns about underwear (or not) over and above the obvious bus incident most of us were told as children.

In fact, some people as so bored for affection and tenderness, that they abuse sensibility to the maximum. Think of all the chafing and rubbing injury that underwear prevents.

Well, it seems some have more time on their hands than others, who forgo shaving on the weekend as a rite of relaxation. Sunday night or Monday morning, it's out with the razor for that business class look.

Talk about chafing itching, heat rash or prickly heat as it's called. Thos red spots are ingrown hairs, trust me.